i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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