Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Randomize
