your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
