ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
