Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I am full of burrito and curiosity
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
