She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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