i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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