Only a mothe r could love this liver
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
