May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize
