Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize