i already hear my dad disowning me
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
only you would photoshop your dick
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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