my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Boobs speak an international language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize