Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
its not stalking. its research.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize
