If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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