Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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