so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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