He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
