stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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