My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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