Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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