Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
