Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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