I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
