after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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