Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
