tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
