just survived the first fart of the relationship.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize