I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
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