I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
