Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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