sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
she peed on how many people?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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