We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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