I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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