New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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