please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
