i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
