just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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