I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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