So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
