you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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