I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
