Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
