yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Oh god it's open bar.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize