Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
