dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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