i permit you to call me
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
