Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
