I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
