Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.

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(813): View more from Florida

So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3

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(513): View more from Ohio

With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.

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(616): View more from Michigan

I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D

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(631): View more from New York

His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"

(1-704): View more from North Carolina

That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.

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