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• (303): View more from Colorado

  If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.

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• 

  The 33 Worst Things Men Have Said While Hitting On Women

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?

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• (716): View more from New York

  Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.

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  17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.

  (602): View more from Arizona

  What other scale is there?

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• (707): View more from California

  Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"

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