I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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