oh fat girl friday strikes again...
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
