why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
