I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
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