im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
