Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Just puked most of my soul out..
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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